Confronting COVID Fatigue - How to Help Your Kids Stay Grateful During Challenging Times

Feeling thankful in today's circumstances might seem impossible, if not counter-intuitive. Yet, gratitude is one key way to cope with the stress of the ongoing crisis.

I recently went on a walk with a friend, a rare experience for many in the previous year. We got to talk about our kids and how they seemed to be tired all of the time.

You may have noticed that this tiredness isn't of the usual kind - it's more of a deep weariness; something that psychologists have called ‘COVID fatigue’.

You might not have heard of it, but it's hitting us all in different ways.

I don't know about you, but for me and my kids, our tiredness means that negativity has crept in. In fact, staying positive has been more challenging for us now than during the initial crisis this time last year.

On one hand, this is understandable since people’s experience of COVID-19 has generally been long and painful. On the other hand, our decline in positivity is somewhat ironic, given that many countries are now moving through the crisis (my heart goes out to those countries with high rates at the moment).

What can we, as parents, do to help our kids stay positive and energised in what we hope is the last stages of the race? 

While we may not be able to change the outer world just yet, there are things we can do within our families to give our kids that boost they need.

One of the things that can uplift our kids now is the practice of gratitude.

The Case for Gratitude

Focusing on gratitude is part of positive psychology, which is the field of science in which I specialize as a university researcher. Many studies show how positive psychology can help us get through times when things aren't going right, and the COVID crisis is just that kind of time.

Countries that compared mental health data before and during COVID noticed a significant increase in psychopathological symptoms like depression and anxiety. Yet, research also shows that some positive emotions have, counter-intuitively, risen during the pandemic, especially when it comes to focusing on family, appreciating what we have, and putting our faith in the future.

According to a global study, the onset of the COVID crisis correlated to a sharp rise in gratitude. In fact, gratitude has coexisted alongside grief, alleviating distress and helping us maintain personal connections.

But why is gratitude so powerful in such situations?

Keeping your focus on the positives, even during a pandemic, is said to boost your emotional stamina. Gratitude can help you maintain hope, remain as happy as possible under the circumstances, and keep your perspective clear.

This approach is beneficial for kids as well as adults, but it might require some effort to achieve. Luckily, there are techniques you can use to both create and express gratitude.

The Techniques

The first thing you can do as a parent to build and maintain your kid's gratitude through the COVID crisis is to help them write about it. Keeping a journal is considered a healthy habit, which could prove to be precious in times like these.

Let your kids outline the positives in their lives and write them down. Taking account of the good things they have can help reduce anxiety and make them feel more thankful.

According to a study, people who regularly made journal entries about their emotions had reduced activity in the amygdala. This is an area of the brain responsible for intense emotions.

In other words, keeping a journal can make you and your children less anxious.

On the subject of writing, a more outreaching activity for your kids would be to send gratitude letters to people who positively influenced them. This might seem like a technique that's mainly beneficial to the recipients, but it can help the writer, too.

Some studies show that writing a thank you letter makes the author feel less depressed and happier. Additionally, it can strengthen relationships with people who matter to us, notwithstanding any measures of physical distancing.

When it comes to building up adaptability and the ability to cope, taking a savouring walk is a great way to boost those vital psychological mechanisms. Savouring means one is intentionally focusing on things in their environment that produce positive feelings.

This technique has been proven helpful in stressful periods because it promotes appreciation and an attitude of gratitude. So, consider taking your kids on a savouring walk for some much-needed psycho-physical refreshment.

Modern technology also offers some solutions in its own right.

Some apps are specifically designed to boost positivity. There are gratitude apps that can give regular reminders for positive thoughts and allow users to capture what makes them thankful through voice memos, photos, or notes.

While it might seem like another superfluous app that's clogging your mobile devices, a gratitude app can reduce how often you and your kids have negative thoughts. Children today are digital natives and they might find such apps even more interesting than some other techniques.

So, try one it out for one or two weeks and you might find yourself and your children considerably more thankful. After all, negativity is hard to avoid in the current circumstances. So if your mobile device can be an ally in that battle, let it do its part.

Maintain Your Psychological Well-Being Through Gratitude

People tend to think that focusing on gratitude in challenging times is a form of false positivity and avoiding the painful reality. However, you don't have to ignore your pain to be grateful.

Things that we can be appreciative of are all around us, in good times and the bad. When life gets stressful and overwhelmingly challenging, our perspective can become skewed and we can start seeing only the negatives.

Gratitude is about bringing your perspective back into balance. When we know how to see the good in our lives it helps put the negatives into proportion during the pandemic and non-pandemic times.

It might not be easy to feel gratitude, but it can become a lifelong source of inner strength in every situation for your kids if they can develop that skill now.

While we’re at it, I’d like to invite you to take our SBP Quiz - How Strength-Based Is Your Parenting. Discover how you score and where improvements lie.